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4.5
How enjoyable it is to read another Kliewer novel and see how poorly written and edited it is! I will mention, however, that this one is not as bad as others I’ve read, but that's not saying much. Finding problems with some of her previous books is kind of a fun sport, in a twisted way. So here I’m just going to point out a few of the more noticeable flaws.Every mention of a “4-wheel rig” is exactly quoted as a 4-wheel rig. This is clunky and stupid for the narration; it sounds like a phrase a character might say in passing, not as a general description. It’s not clear whether these are cars, trucks, jeeps, whatever, but the typical narration should just say “SUV” or car, in most cases. Even funnier, Deedra is “eccentric enough” to own one. How many million SUVs are on the road these days? In a similar vein, the book uses the term “rock-hound” to describe a person interested in geology. It’s goofy and awkward. Then the place where any character stays/rests/sleeps is usually their “abode,” which also sounds weird after so many repetitions.There’s a disconnect between chapter 2, where Deedra has a secret admiration for Brent and must never let him know how much she cares, and then in chapter 4 when she kisses him after a few words. It seems like the characters are suddenly crazy about each other with no development to lead to this. On p. 81, Brent suggests running off to Vegas to get married. Then, extremely randomly and out of nowhere in chapter 21, “To prove that his accident hadn’t incapacitated him, Brent made love to her right there in Frank’s shack.”Everyone seems to refer to other characters as “young people”, though I imagine most of the characters are in their 20’s and 30’s. The author must be very old if she doesn’t realize that no one under 65 would refer to other adults as “young people.” Also oddly, there are strict gender boundaries all throughout the book for how women/men behave, react, etc. This would make sense in some times in history or in other cultures, but it doesn’t ring true for modern times (2000s) in an allegedly mainstream USA setting.Here’s an example of a silly, black-and-white sentence, “She wanted a secure home and children, but supposed she would end up a career woman without a family,” (p. 18). Apparently it’s 100% either-or. The Mark character is described as taking “guff off no man.” Why not “off no one”? Or simply “taking no guff”? Then in Chapter 3, “she secretly suspected the young people at the hotel had protected Valerie and Shelley from Rhonda’s lechery and Derryck’s kookiness.” Oh, the poor little delicate female artists had to be protected from their own peers? In a group of only 6 total? This makes no sense. It comes up again on p. 52: “I suspect that Mark and Zach had their hands full keeping Rhonda from trying to get Shelley and Valerie involved in her pornographic art.” Apparently women cannot make their own decisions about porn or anything else.A few more funny quotations: “The coyotes made him uneasy? Sounds more like a woman,” (p. 186). “Women don’t like it when men traipse all over the world on news stories,” (p. 54). On p. 58, the men all own knives while the women claim they don’t, but they do. Huh? Describing the porn author: “She flaunted herself all the time. You know how those sexy gals in movies do it.” When Brent goes missing, inexplicably, the men go out searching and the women just watch. After this, “Daylight outlined the weary looks on the men’s faces, and the frightened looks on the women’s,” (p. 128). Well, I guess we all have to pick a side and never, never cross the gender line, or Kliewer just wouldn’t know what to do with us!
